I have no idea what I want in life except that I want to be happy... I try to define myself but I can't quite do it... I have learned that I am more than a career or a job, but sometimes when I ask myself "who am I?" it's hard to come up with an answer... The fact that I don't know what I want has gotten mixed with what I am and I feel completely lost...
I want to find something I want and fight for it and I was planning on following other people advice but I think that's not the right plan, the thing is I am not short of ideas, the problem is I have trouble figuring out which ones I like and which I don't, specially if I have other people around me telling me what they think I would like... That's how I started this blog, following advice that I thought sounded great but my heart wasn't completely in the idea, I was confused and felt pressured I had to do it in a certain way, meet someone else's standards of how a blog should be... I was afraid I would reveal too much and become vulnerable... So after only one post that was seen by only one person, I stopped...
Today I am back... because I feel in my heart I need to write... not for anyone but me, but this time rather than keeping it to myself I'm saving my thoughts here in this unknown blog for everyone and no one to see...
I quit my job in may, and took another one that I didn't quite want... I decided the "right" thing to do was to take it and try something else to see if it would become my passion... also because everyone around me thought I would like it and encouraged me to take it... it's only been 3 weeks and I am ready to quit, the problem is I'm not ready to tell anyone yet (not even my boss) .... I hope tomorrow I find the courage I need to stop doing what others want me to do and start fighting for what I think I might want... I may not be sure of what that is yet but I am sure that this job isn't it ...
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